By Raymond Heng
1. Plan the activities (Recommend at least 6 months prior to the wedding date).
Always have your big day in mind and how you would like it to be. You will need to come up with a schedule of all the activities that are going to take place on your big day. From there you will need to decide how much time to give yourself to arrange for all those activities to take place on your big day. For a list of standard activities you can find them on any wedding planner websites. As I am Singaporean, a very useful site is at Singaporean brides.
2. Seek advice from married couples.
When you seek help from those who have been through the wedding day, they can really give you very valuable insight and help you save on time, cost and avoid trouble.
3. Plan your wedding budget.
This is the most tricky part of the preparation as you can burst your budget very easily if you do not keep a close tap or be very ambitious and want to throw a once in a life time grand million dollar wedding. It can strained your relationship with your fiancé if both of you have different ideas on the activities of your wedding. It is a good to be honest with your fiancé about your net worth and how much you can afford based on your take home income from the start. This way, expectations are managed and each of you will accommodate each other automatically even without you knowing.
4. Choose a wedding date.
For us Chinese, it will coincide with an auspicious day. We will visit a medium for them to assist us to pick an auspicious date according to the lunar calendar. This applies to any couple of any race and religion.
5. Determine wedding practices of both parties.
The two major factors that will directly affect the activities of your wedding day and the events that lead up to it, are the religion and dialect group of you and your spouse. Different practices and customs are observer by the Cantonese, Hokkien, Teochew etc. If the couple is of different dialect groups then both parties have to discuss and compromise and how far each side can practice their customary wedding rituals.
6. Decide on the location of the banquet.
You would have gone to many of the hotels or restaurants to feel the ambience and look at the wedding menu and package. Choose a location that is easily accessible by everyone, preferably a centralized location. This is important if your wedding falls on weekdays as your guest might have difficulty getting there on time if their offices are located far away from your wedding banquet.
7. Estimate the minimum number of tables for the banquet.
This is one of the tricky tasks which I have to grapple with. Before you can determine this number, you need to ask the hotel or restaurant that is holding your wedding banquet what is the minimum sitting requirement in-order to qualify for their package. All the hotels and restaurants will offer you a package ranging in prices and menu selection. Different charges apply for weekday and weekends. From there, you have to draw up a draft sitting plan and come up with names of your invited guests.
8. Draw up the seat arrangement.
The best thing I have learned from past weddings where I was an invited guest is to put people who know each other in the same table. When I had to sit alone in a table with people who I do not know, I felt awkward and hoped that time will pass quickly. For my wedding, I placed family in the same table and colleagues together in the same table. When it comes to shifting to fill up gaps, you have to shift people in groups. You sitting arrangement will not be finalized till very close to your wedding day. Expect people to pull out at the last moment and others not able to confirm their sittings. You have to get confirmation from your entire guest so that you can advise your hotel/restaurant the final number of tables. It is a lot of hard work and even frustration. It is easier said than done.
9. Choose the bridal shop.
It is better that someone whom you know recommends and refer you to a bridal shop as that person has personally engaged their services and is satisfied with good comments given. The recommender will advise you on what you can ask more for to stretch your wedding budget. You can also enjoy a special pricing with a better negotiated package when you are being referred. The referrer could enjoy a commission. It's a win-win situation. Unless you know the owner of the bridal shop would I advise to do it alone.
10. Stay healthy during the preparation.
Preparing for a wedding is a lot of hard work apart from juggling with your day job, family and personal obligations. There will be disappointments and last minute changes that will catch you by surprise. I have been in a position where I was overwhelmed with so many things to do and time is running out. In-order to handle the stress of your wedding preparation is to stay in shape and exercise regularly. Have sufficient sleep and start your activities early to avoid surprises.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Raymond Heng specializes in software development, software testing and software safety. He also writes articles on various topics of interest, especially the 10 steps series to solving certain problems and book reviews on favourite authors. To get instant access to all his articles, book reviews, strategies, tools, and resources that he uses in his daily life, visit: http://web.singnet.com.sg/~raindeer/. You can also visit his company "Express Learner" which brings you information and resources to help you in building your multiple streams of income to financial freedom
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